note to self

I call myself an “actress with an appetite”, right? You’ve seen the appetite part, but where does the actress come into play? I haven’t starred on a hit TV show, let alone had a one-line role on a sitcom. Perhaps the title for my blog should be “aspiring-actress-with-an-appetite-(that-she-should-control-because-the-camera-adds-10-lbs)”. But it’s not. And never will be.

As a 5 year old, I told my mom “I want to be an actress and waitress” (smart kid I was!). And I have been pursuing that dream ever since. Not always in the most direct routes, but one of the things I value in life is to “experience it”. Fully. I chose to attend college, I leave LA to visit friends and family frequently, I don’t obsess over calories, and I don’t allow fear of not being the person they [Hollywood} want dictate my decisions (98% of the time). Obviously there are moments when I doubt myself, AND I didn’t waltz in to LA three years ago with this mindset. But I’ve learned self-confidence and a good dose of “you are enough” mantras of are key to a happy creative lifestyle.

Right now I audition, not frequently, but getting into rooms. I am making my own content and wine videos. It’s not the average path to getting a role, but it’s my way. There’s a quote out there about how “when a spaceship launches it inevitably ends up diverting off the scheduled-course numerous times before landing on the moon.” I have to be my own champion and define my own success in order to not throw in the towel. I am going to land on the moon damnit! It might not be next week, but I will keep working hard in order to land that role.

NOTE TO SELF:

I am an actress and I have a huge appetite for life (donuts, fried chicken, and cereal milk soft serve). Keep doing you. It’s worth the time spent. Believe in yourself.

NOTE TO FRIENDS AND READERS:
  • Stay creative (if that’s what you like)
  • Do things that bring you happiness (try a bunch of activities if you’re not sure what that is)
  • Define your own success (if you leave it up to others, you’ll never feel fulfilled)
  • 99% of the time, at least look at the dessert list (1% of the time you’ll be so full you’ll need to be wheeled out of the joint)

Let me know what you’re pursuits are, I’d love to watch, listen, participate, and promote in any way I can.